Sense of security

It is my personal opinion; what it means to me at this moment and I think my idea of this will forever be changing, evolving, retracting and rejuvenating that I don’t think I could come up with the preferred answer even if I wanted to.

As I sit here and write this blog I am constantly distracted by my thoughts which go In multiple directions, sometime I feel like smoking a cigarette would give me a sense of security when I am stressed, sometimes it’s my girlfriends hug which give me comfort, its ignoring everything and just watching my TV shows on Netflix that bring comfort to a rather diabolical mind which makes me go round and round.

Let’s start with why would we need a sense of security in the first place, we all have a home to stay in, a blanket to wrap ourselves in and warm food which would give us comfort, but the constant thought my destructive mind has is what if I lose all of this. What if all of this is taken away from Me.? Then what do I do? Where will I be? What is my backup option?

The truth is I don’t have one and I wonder if Mukesh Ambani has one either. He is just one bad decision away from losing it all in. His brother Anil is a prime example of it.

I remember where I had read a story on official humans of Bombay once, a lady; after the passing away of her parents in goa had sold her house for 30 Lakhs and shifted to Bombay to live the dream of becoming a singer or actress but I think it was 8 months in that she had exhausted all her money and became homeless, My fear is the same what if I lose all of it? Where will I go?

There’s days where I am so frustrated and so eely that I just need tidiness around me because everything is thrown around everywhere and just tiding that up, changing my sheets and laying down does give me comfort for that little while;

But maybe there is no sense of security, no amount of fixed deposits or no amount of properties can give you the sense of security that we crave. Diabolically I also believe that the best sense of security is to go to work, keep your head down and be passionate about what you’re doing. Just be happy. Maybe that’s the answer?